Infinite Zero, Little "I"

Turn off all that is not true to your nature,Feel your purification fires raging within.And after the fire which consumed part of you,You will see your everything.You will see the real essence of Self.Your soul essence can never be consumed.
-- Alan Seale

I wasn't brave enough to just walk away.  I didn't have the guts to pull the trigger.   And so, it's a slow death -- a deconstruction, piece-by-piece.  Thankfully, I haven't suffered much.  Now, finally ...

... it's a good time to die!

It was a good life: a healthy body, a strong mind, a balanced upbringing, and an amazing education in and out of the classroom.  It needed purpose and to make a contribution -- countless experiments through the many nights.  I had lots of fun -- that was the best part:  hiking, skiing the Cascades, Sierras, and Rockies; flying small airplanes up and down the western US and Canada; thrashing about the country as an entitled entrepreneur, racing around in finely engineered sports cars.  I met a lot of good women and a few great men.  I raised a lot of hell!  I offended more than my share -- and endeared myself to many others.  I loved and was loved.  All-in-all, there's not much to complain about.  It could now be a time to think about getting comfortable -- and,  growing old.

Instead, it burns! We should reach zero soon, but I can't be sure.  I've forgotten what it looks like.  Will I recognize it?  This is pretty scary stuff - but, with it, intense anticipation!  What was left beneath all these worn layers?  What will survive the fire?

The things which are seen are temporal; 
but the things which are not seen are eternal.
-- Saint Paul, 2 Corinthians 4:18

1 comment:

  1. Once there lived a village of creatures along the bottom of a great crystal river. The current of the river swept silently over them all--young and old, rich and poor, good and evil, the current going its own way, knowing only its own crystal self.

    Each creature in its own manner clung tightly to the twigs and rocks of the river bottom, for clinging was their way of life, and resisting the current what each had learned from birth. But one creature said at last, "I am tired of clinging. Though I cannot see it with my eyes, I trust that the current knows where it is going. I shall let go, and let it take me where it will. Clinging, I shall die of boredom."

    The other creatures laughed and said, "Fool! Let go, and that current you worship will throw you tumbled and smashed across the rocks and you will die quicker than boredom!" But the one heeded them not, and taking a breath did let go, and at once was tumbled and smashed by the current across the rocks.

    Yet in time, as the creature refused to cling again, the current lifted him free from the bottom, and he was bruised and hurt no more. And the creatures downstream, to whom he was a stranger, cried, "See a miracle! A creature like ourselves, yet he flies! See the Messiah, come to save us all!"

    And the one carried in the current said, "I am no more Messiah than you. The river delights to lift us free, if only we dare let go. Our true work is this voyage, this adventure." But they cried the more, "Savior!" all the while clinging to the rocks, and when they looked again he was gone, and they were left alone making legends of a Savior.

    © Richard Bach